A Kiss To Build A Dream On

Yesterday, I had lunch with a friend of mine. She and I worked together for a little while over the years but we are not good friends by any stretch of the imagination. We get along, we have conversation, but it is mostly about work. She is a newlywed and I asked how that was going for her—probably one of the most personal questions that we have ever really ventured into as work friends. Of course, she is still in total bliss as a newlywed bride—she talked about how things are still kind of the same, but a little different too. It got me thinking about marriage, the early days, the not so early days, and how you change as a person and as a couple.


Our seven year anniversary is on Sunday. Yep, seven years, and there better not be any itching. ;) You hear people talk about the early days of marriage and how blissful there were. Mine were not. Not because of the person I married but because I personally was going through some significant life changes. I was very unhappy in my job, attempting to no avail to find a new one, and trying to make our first house a home. How my husband put up with me during that time is utterly amazing as I am sure I was a basket case full of emotions. I remember sitting on my bed every Sunday crying about how I did not want to go to work the next day. You know things were bad when you are doing that. Things got better with a single phone call and my career path has since been altered forever. Amazingly enough, the days, months, and years of happiness became blissful.

Fast forward another a couple of years and there was a bump in the road the size of Mount Everest. This was not the highlight of marriage, and in fact, some of the darkest times I have ever known, but it was the mountain that we had to climb together to get where we are today. We worked really hard and choose to make our marriage work. It was not without a lot of talking, tears, praying, frustration, and fear, but the trek down from the peak of that mountain helped me know that we had made the right decisions. Marriage is work. Hard work. But it’s the best kind of work.

Another year later, we are kissing on the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris, France. Travelling the world, experiencing new places, new foods, new things, and most importantly, I found my favorite travelling companion. I never dreamed that I would get my husband into an art museum, but I did—and more than one too. I even challenged him to come up with a piece of art that he liked or spoke to him in some way. He did. Just as I challenge him, he challenges me back with trying new foods, tasting the wine, and to break out of my rut of me just being me. And twirling in the Grand Place would not have been done without a little encouragement.

There have been many adventures and I know many more to come with this man of mine. I knew I loved him the day I said “Yes.” I knew I loved him on the day I said “I do.” But words can not even explain what love is when you hold a tiny human being in your arms and bigger arms are wrapped around you for extra support and love. My husband and I have seen for better and for worse, we have seen for sickness (thankfully nothing too bad) and health. Love is not all passion and fireworks and the longer I am married, the more I realize that. But love is helping your wife wash her body post baby and post caesarian so that she will fell like a human being again. Love is being patient as a gamut of emotions rocks you back and forth from pain, crazy hormones, and lack of sleep. Love is waking up at 2am trying to help you hook up a formula contraption because gosh darn it, breastfeeding WILL work for you even if it means no sleep. Love is sharing all of your highest of highs and lowest of lows. Love is knowing that you just need to give some space sometimes. Love is having someone in your corner—agree or disagree with you. Love is many things that I can not even begin to count—all of which I get a bazillion times over from my husband. And you know something, I know this is the tip of what is to come.

Happy good memories, happy bad memories, and happy everything that celebrates us. I know the best is yet to come.

Music Inspiration: “A Kiss To Build A Dream On”—Louis Armstrong